I'm about to start a new day at work and I'm wishing that it were Friday again. Well, this is nothing new-I always wish it were a friday and that it's time for me to kick back and relax with friends and spend my Sundays home watching tv.

But today, I want it more than most days. I want to be home lying in my bed and letting myself be preoccupied with the shows on tv. I've been feeling down and I want to escape where I am at right now.

The holidays almost always manage to bring me down. It's a reminder of loneliness and inadequacy of the past and what the future may bring. Such a bleak perspective I know. I've always struggled with this, but it's only now that I'm actually admiting this truth about what I've been masking out for many years...

My last entry has spoken about a real turning point in my life. It was like the dawn of a new day-A day filled with hope and infinite possibilities. Though I still struggle with trying to figure out how to get what I want out of life and how to live my dreams, I'm breathing new air and I've got a smile on my face.

I've decided to get a job in the field of IT again and I've been working for about a month now. It's been really busy and stressful. I've experienced a shock in my system after being a bum for about 7 months. But even if I go home exhausted, there's a sense of fulfillment. I feel that I've taken the next steps towards real change.

I'm still getting accustomed to the scheme of things at work. I'm still feeling the shock of the fast pace and work load. But it's a challenge that I'll overcome eventually. I'll probably have entries about the good and the bad things the future will bring. It's part of work and it's part of life. I look forward to and dread them at the same time.